I think it’s safe to say that at one time or another, everyone has been afraid to make a mistake or look foolish. Some people are able to push through anyway, but not everyone is able to do that. If these fears stop you from having what you want in life, there’s a simple exercise that can help.

I encourage all of my clients to make a list of the fears that hold them back.

There are tons of things to list… fear of failure, fear of success, fear of being vulnerable, fear of judgment, not being good enough… the list can go on forever. I encourage you to make a list and make it as long as you can make it. Take a real inventory of all of your fears and get them on paper.

When you have them all listed out, make another 3 columns on this sheet so that you can write down some more information about each one.

In the next column, write down the potential consequences in your mind… the worst thing that can happen if your fear comes to fruition.

In the column right next to that, write down on a scale of 1-10 how realistic this consequence is. This is your Reality Check.

For example… I might write down in the 1st column that I have a fear of failure. In the 2nd column, I write that the potential worst consequence that I play out in my mind is that I will be abandoned with no friends, no business, no love and will look like a fool. 

When I do a Reality Check, I give this a score of 1… MEANING IT IS COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS! I know that my close family and good friends will love me no matter what, so all of this is just some dumb story that I made up. AND IT HAD STOPPED ME FROM REALIZING MY POTENTIAL IN LIFE.

In the last column, write down what this fear has cost you. I might write here that this fear cost me a promotion with more money because I was too afraid to fail. It cost me my pride because I’m ashamed that I was a coward.

Focus on what this cost you and pretty soon, the pain will become so great that you will force yourself to get outside your comfort zone… BECAUSE OF THE SIMPLE FACT THAT THE PAIN OF STAYING WHERE YOU ARE OUTWEIGHS THE FEAR OF MOVING FORWARD.

Please always feel free to reach out and I can give you more tips on how to be the best version of you!

Jayne Goldman, MBA, C.Ht., Founder and Principal of Best Life Hypnotherapy in Los Angeles, is a Certified Hypnotherapist and NLP Master NLP Practitioner and Coach.


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