Ever found yourself caught in the trap of taking remarks and behaviors of others a little too personally? It’s a common human tendency—one that can color our perception of the world around us.

Just this morning, a simple interaction reminded me of the power of our “personal filters.” I had just returned from my morning gym session, while my husband was coming back from his daily walk—a dedicated 10-mile daily routine he does without fail.

He mentioned his plan to grab some coffee before continuing his walk, explaining he had covered 7 miles already and still had 3 more to go. I suggested, “Why don’t we go out to breakfast together?” He responded with, “No… I want to finish my walk.” I just took what he said at face value and continued on with my day… never for one second inserting meaning about myself in the conversation.

Mind you, my husband and I have been married for 40 years now and understand each other very well. Before doing NLP Coaching work ourselves years ago for personal development, we both had a great deal of “baggage” that we brought into our relationship and our conversations.

In a different time, influenced by the lens of “Nobody loves me” that I used to wear, I might have interpreted his response quite differently. I would have heard more than his words—a suggestion that his choice held deeper implications about our relationship. But over time and through my own hypnotherapy sessions and NLP training, I’ve learned that our filters shape our perception more than the words themselves. Instead of allowing my past insecurities to color the situation, I recognized that he simply wanted to complete his walk—his words held no secret messages about our connection.

This little moment got me thinking about life filters on a broader scale. What lens do we use to view the world? Does it project self-love and positivity, or does it sometimes taint our reality with doubt and negativity? If we often gravitate toward negativity, it’s time to reconsider the filter we’re using. I’ve shifted from interpreting every comment through the lens of “nobody loves me” to understanding that not everything revolves around me. In fact, very little does.

So, I invite you to ponder the filter through which you perceive life. Is it one that radiates self-love and positivity, or does it sometimes blur your outlook with self-doubt and pessimism? If the latter seems familiar, remember that change is within your grasp. You hold the power to recalibrate your perspective, fine-tune your filter, and allow genuine joy to shine through.

If your thoughts aren’t consistently steering you toward happiness, know you’re not alone in this journey. And you have options. Reach out for a complimentary phone consultation—an opportunity to explore the idea of shifting your perspective. 

You might be amazed at how a simple adjustment can pave the way for authentic joy and personal growth. After all, the path to self-love and genuine happiness often begins with adjusting the lens through which we perceive the world around us.

Jayne Goldman, MBA, C.Ht., Founder and Principal of Best Life Hypnotherapy in Los Angeles, is a Certified Hypnotherapist and NLP Master NLP Practitioner and Coach